


Vento aureo headcanons

by Cherry_Bombb



Category: JoJo - Fandom, ジョジョの奇妙な冒険 | JoJo no Kimyou na Bouken | JoJo's Bizarre Adventure
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Alternate Universe - No Stands (JoJo), Diavolo and Vinegar Doppio Don't Share a Body, Italian Mafia, Melone is a whore, Multi, Office AU, cioccolata 10000IQ man, crackfic, egirl melone, i literally only mention sorbet and gelato, its mostly seccolata because im a disgusting fan, minors don't have sex, most of them are legal adults, secco is mostly non-verbal because i can, seccolata - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-30
Updated: 2020-07-01
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:33:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24995425
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cherry_Bombb/pseuds/Cherry_Bombb
Summary: All of Passione works in a regular office AU so the characters are my versions. Most of these are one-shots but some are correlated, basically it's all on the same "office AU"It's my first fanfic and I'm not a native english speaker so....I hope you guys enjoy it!
Relationships: Cioccolata/Secco (JoJo), Diavolo/Vinegar Doppio, Gelato/Sorbet (JoJo), Giorno Giovanna/Guido Mista, Giorno Giovanna/Trish Una, Leone Abbacchio/Bruno Buccellati, Pannacotta Fugo/Narancia Ghirga, Risotto Nero/Prosciutto, Squalo/Tiziano (JoJo)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 20





	1. The crack whore

**Author's Note:**

> TRIGGER WARNING: Prostitution and childhood trauma.  
> Melone the e-thot

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Prostitution and NSFW!!!
> 
> I wrote this entire chapter listening to Juicy by Doja Cat and Literal Legend by Ayesha Erotica so those songs are literally my biggest inspiration to write about my own version of Melone  
> I hope you guys find this AU interesting!!!

Melone has always been interested in nasty stuff since he was a kid. Since his most tender childhood he has always been exposed to promiscuity and women selling their bodies for money and drugs, so he became what he had always been exposed to: a porn star. But not only that, he had another job, he just liked exposing his own body to the internet for money that all of his thirsty fans would give him to "please" Melone.

"I fucking hate this shitshow of a job..." Melone sighed as he lit the cigarette he was holding in his mouth. He was almost already home from his shift at the office, it was a rainy night the street was barely visible, only the dim lights of the streetlights could be seen in the darkness. Melone was wearing a baggy hoodie with the hood up to prevent his silky lavender hair from getting wet, heavy eyelids and a tired expression on his feminine face from such a boring experience staying in the office was. When he finally got to his little flat he opened a bag of chips that were laying somewhere in the kitchen and checked all of his social media while doing so. As soon as he finished the entire bag which was his dinner for that day he headed to the bathroom to take a quick refreshing shower. The feeling of water running down his spine, droplets of water falling off the tip of his nose and chin, the sweet smell of rose scented soap filling the room... Bath time was such a relaxing time for Melone but the fun was about to begin.

He wrapped his legs with a towel and put his fake lashes on carefully, fishnet stockings and booty shorts with a leather thong behind; a short ACDC vintage crop top so short his nipples were already showing. Melone looked at himself in the mirror while putting his hair on a little bun leaving his signature strand of hair almost covering his dreamy turquoise eye untouched. "They'll love you as they always do" he thought while showing his ass to the mirror as if trying to strike a provocative pose. He had his recording set already prepared to go live, the same moment he turned all of the cameras on, at least a hundred people were already watching him. "Hello, is the microphone working? Can you guys hear me?" he said lightly tapping the microphone, the only lights turned on in his house at the moment were dim purple led lights who were making the cybersex experience more visually pleasing. 

When he reached his donation goal he started unbuttoning his shorts and freeing his throbbing cock, he definitely needs the money to buy his shit for next lives so his fans should better be donating their monthly salary on letting him buy pretty things. He was slowly masturbating in a teasing manner in front of the camera, reading all of the comments praising him and telling him how much they'd do just to get a one night stand with him. He introduced toys into his ass and stuck phallic looking food in his mouth including his entire fist in an attempt to brag about his non-existent gag reflex.  
A couple of hours had passed and the effect of the cocaine he had snorted before had already worn off, he finally ended the infamous livestream thanking the people who donated the most in a very personal and sexual way while removing the buttplug off his ass in front of the camera trying to get a good angle to show his ass in HD.

He laid on the bed naked with a big sigh "Tomorrow will be the same fucking thing, it always is... But at least I get to have some nighttime fun..." he chuckled and finally fell asleep while watching keeping up with the kardashians on his iPhone. What Melone didn't know was that tomorrow he would meet a couple of twisted beings who would completely change his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed it! Feedback is more than welcome!!! (●'◡'●)   
> Probably tomorrow I'll have the next chapter up this week if you guys like the plot and the AU.


	2. The doctor has entered the room

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Despite Ghiaccio's advice about not talking to Cioccolata, Melone still has a somewhat unnerving conversation with him.

As soon as the elevator's doors opened Melone got a little bit worried. Usually the people working on his floor would be really loud and at least two or three guys would be arguing and yelling at each other until Doppio, the manager, would ask them to stop and eventually prevent them from getting physical. But today wasn't the case, everyone was oddly quiet. He approached Ghiaccio with a friendly smile on:  
Melone: "Hey! Ghia, is everything okay...? You're usually screaming around like your annoying ass alwa-"  
Ghiaccio: "They have found Sorbet and Gelato. They have found their lifeless bodies in the middle of the woods by the road, if it wasn't for their matching nail polish the police couldn't have recognized them as their faces were mutilated and bitten. The cops say it was probably a bear attack but I don't think so."

The lilac haired man was astonished by these words, he froze on the spot and covered his mouth with his hand. "Wait, are you serious? This can't be." Ghiaccio only slowly nodded and held his hand, Melone leaned in for a hug but the blue haired boy pushed him away and furiously punched his desk several times in a rage fit. "I CAN'T UNDERSTAND WHY THE FUCK DOES THIS HAVE TO HAPPEN TO US? WHY THEM?!" Ghiaccio screamed at the top of his lungs with his face completely red, everyone was looking at him "I just don't get it.... Why couldn't it have been I don't know, someone else...?" He said and looked indiscreetly at Cioccolata who was sitting next to Melone's table, the former surgeon replied with a silent deathly glare that sent chills down his spine and made him shut up. Melone pat the other's back "Don't worry ice baby, we will get through this! But still, just think that now they are in heaven probably making out and being happy together!" he cheerfully said backing up trying to head to his working space.

When he was leaving his stuff in his office an incredibly tall and lanky figure got close to him and placed his long bony fingers on the young man's shoulders slightly clawing his long manicured nails on the flesh "hey." he said with a wide smile looking down at the other's eyes unintentionally menacingly, god, this man was incredibly creepy. "Hey...?" 

Melone's turquoise eyes met the other's emerald abbysms penetrating straight into his pupils, he had bright green dreadlocks and was wearing really strange makeup but somehow he didn't look that bad with it. "I just heard about what happened to two of your friends, I'm very sorry Melone." he said in a fake sad tone but judging by his expression he wasn't sorry at all and that was very weird to Melone, still he didn't think of it much.

Melone: "How do you even know my name?"

Cioccolata: "I'm not sure... I guess I know everyone's names"-he grinned malevously- "although... What I'm sure about is that you already know my name. Don't you?

Cioccolata was giving poor Melone really bad chills, he just tried to do as little eye contact as possible and said "Yeah, your name is Cioccolata, why do you ask?" in response the tall man chuckled "Oh I see. Then I'm sure the must have warned you about me... Right?" he said in a disturbingly cheerful way. Just when Cioccolata opened his mouth with a big smile just to say something, Ghiaccio tightly grabbed Melone's arm and pushed him back.

Melone: "Ouch! What the hell are you doing?"

Ghiaccio: "I'm saving your ass! Why are you so fucking dumb? Didn't I tell you not to talk to Mr.BDSM psycho sadistic ex-surgeon?"

Melone tried to not laugh at the nickname but failed miserably, Cioccolata was less than a meter apart from them hearing every single word they said as if he couldn't hear those dumbasses looking at them incredibly confused by the conversation. But he was less than impressed, he is hated by everyone he knows except for Secco so he's already used to this kind of bs. As they kept on talking shit about him he just checked his phone in case his dear Secco had called and he would sometimes overhear Melone and Ghiaccio's conversation.

Melone: "Okay but, like.... What's wrong with him? I mean he's a little bit creepy but he hasn't done anything awful to me... yet."

Ghiaccio: "I don't know okay?! I really care about you and I don't wanna see you around freaks like him... I mean, he just gives me really bad vibes, just look at him!" he shouted obviously pointing directly at Cio almost touching him "Im sure this dude probably eats human meat and performs satanic rituals!!! And I've also heard that he has a really weird partner, can you fucking imagine loving this guy?!"

The purple haired guy looked at Cioccolata who seemed really pissed right now "Alright, alright! You win! I won't talk to him alright?" and gave an apologetic glance to Cioccolata "Now leave me do my shit because i have A SHIT TON of paperwork to do please..."

When Melone's shift had already ended he started to pick up his stuff to leave Cioccolata gasped as he noticed his target was leaving the building "Wait!" Cioccolata said grabbing the other's hand briefly "Are you going to ignore me still? Pathetic." Cioccolata said with his usual straight face. Melone looked at him dead in the eye and gave him a side smile "What are you gonna do about it?" he replied briefly, he had no bad intentions anyways but he's been talked about Cioccolata enough to know to not let him belittle him.

Cioccolata lightly gasped at this and his smile now was more of a genuine one "I like you" he chuckled and put his hand over the others shoulder to be closer to him. "You know... I know about your hobby." Melone was shocked hearing this "How the hell do you know that? Only Ghiaccio knows it and I DEFINITELY know that he hasn't told you because he won't even look at you." Cioccolata continued talking "Well... A little someone has eyes everywhere... But I can't say who"

He smiled. "Well, back to where I was going! You know, you attract what you are, right? And if I am such a terrible person and a freak... And I have showed a little bit of interest in you sooooo, that means you're just like me! Or almost." Melone shook his head at Cioccolata's strange theory "I-"The doctor put his finger over the other's lips "No, no. I think you're interesting, here's my phone number, I'll show you real fun. Trust me, you know absolutely nothing about LIFE" he said emphasizing on the last word, it was a sick pun to him but Melone's mind didn't imagine the things that he was about to witness the next days.


End file.
